There's Something About Mary

First published in The Oxford Journal on Wednesday, March 11, 2015, by Sara Jewell Mattinson.

Imagine your house burns down on a Saturday night. You and your kids are homeless and have lost everything in the fire. Over the weekend, you manage to get yourself together enough that you only miss one day of work.

When you arrive at work on the Tuesday following the fire, wearing the donated clothes that are best suited for work but still involve a pair of yoga pants, your boss looks you over. 

“That’s an interesting outfit,” she says. “What do you think it is, Casual Friday?”

As shocking as that boss’s utter lack of compassion is, it may be a symptom of our growing disconnect with each other.

According to Mary Purdy, a long-time yoga instructor and healthy living facilitator, we are all born with the capacity for compassion but it’s a skill that must be developed.

“Compassion is about seeing suffering and wanting to do something about it,” she explains as we sip tea in her home in Streets Ridge. “More importantly, it’s about doing something about the suffering. Compassion takes a lot of courage.”

In this spirit of taking action, Mary is shifting the focus of her education and workshops to compassion because she believes we live in the kind of world that no longer encourages the development of that skill. 

“The place where we used to learn about compassion and kindness, the church, is no longer there,” she says. “The other thing is this culture we’ve created. It’s about keeping the economy going by buying and it’s all throwaway stuff. We’ve become a materialistic society and that means I have to do and be something bigger and better than you. To be a successful person doesn’t have much to do with compassion. I think we need to reverse that.”

Having worked in local schools over the years and being married to an education assistant, Mary knows first-hand the stresses facing students, teachers and parents. 

“These are trying times in the education system,” she says. “Teachers are so overwhelmed they don’t want one more thing to do, like a breathing meditation or a compassion circle but compassion cultivates trust and safety. I think many children don’t feel safe and they don’t trust. I think many teachers don’t feel safe and don’t trust because they don’t believe the resources and the support will ever come.”

Mary recently conducted a compassion circle with the 24 students in Mrs. LeBlanc’s Grade 3 class at Oxford Regional Education Centre. 

“We sat in a circle and I was just the same size as them which worked out very nicely,” she laughs. “We talked about what compassion means to them then we talked about when someone showed them kindness. That’s how they understand compassion but when they talked about kindness, it was definitely compassion.”

She says she was warned that the students wouldn’t be able to sit still for more than 20 minutes but when she asked after 30 minutes if they wanted to close the circle, they said no. 

The compassion circle lasted an hour and Mary was amazed at the honesty with which the children expressed themselves. This hunger for more meaningful connection with others fuels Mary’s passion for teaching compassion to children and adults.

“I want to rattle the cage,” Mary says. “I want to be somebody who wakes people up. I want to be the one that comes in and points out that we’re all interested in stopping bullying then say ‘Stop using that language’. What we’re interested in is creating more peace. I don’t want to hear that someone is labeled a bully; that person is someone who needs skills. That’s the person who needs compassion.”

Mary, who is a member of the Atlantic Contemplative Centre in Halifax, sees herself as being part of a compassion evolution but one could argue that if Mary is out to rattle cages and challenge language (and bosses), well, that sounds a lot like a revolution. 

Tomorrow's Field Notes Column

"Compassion is a practically acquired knowledge, like dancing. You must do it and practice diligently day by day."
-- Karen Armstrong

For this week's column, I share my conversation with Mary Purdy, who is making it her mission to teach children and adults about compassion and develop the skill of caring about each other.
"I'm interested in getting people to make connections with themselves, to reconnect with their basic goodness," Mary told me. "That's when they can recognize the basic goodness in other people."

The Tyranny of the Time Change

We have got to stop the insanity of the time change. It's not so bad in the fall when we move our body clocks back an hour but in the spring,
there is no other word,
UUNNGGHH.
I try not to whine and complain and moan but when I had to be at church for a 9:30 service this morning, ruling out the possibility of sleeping until my body woke naturally at its usually pre-change time, I couldn't help myself. I flopped into a pew and said, "There should be a rule that church is cancelled on time change Sunday!"
Now it's time for the traditional time change Sunday nap.

Taking the High Road

What a beautiful walk this morning, through the woods and over the river. 
For snowmobilers and people who have lived here all their lives, this is not a big deal -- walking over the frozen River Philip next to the TransCanada Highway -- but for me, Big Moment!
This is the first time I've done the loop from my friend Jane's house along the old rail bed trail and cross the river to continue along the other side and back through town to her house. It's a really pretty walk on the other side, one I've never done because we only walk to the river in the spring and fall, and of course can't go any further. Why it's taken us three years to do this loop in the winter is beyond me. Using the snowmobile trails for walking the dogs is the best way to keep active during the winter and thank goodness the Oxford and Area Trails Association is working so hard to get the multi-use trail open (as part of the TransCanada Trail). As part of their work to complete the trail, a bridge is being installed to complete this loop, over the river right here, right where I'm standing. Very soon, we'll be able to do these early morning walks year-round.
I didn't appreciate what a difference the bridge will make to the Oxford area until I walked across the river this morning so to quote Councillor Darlene Ellis, "Let's build that bridge!"

In Conversation With...Jeff Marchant

First published in The Oxford Journal on Wednesday, March 4, 2015 by Sara Jewell Mattinson.

During summers at the family cottage in West Pugwash, a boy from Oxford sat on the shores of the harbour and watched salt boats manoeuvre through the channel. He watched every time a ship sailed in or out, even begging his parents to wake him up in the middle of the night so he could see a ship come in. 

Makes perfect sense, then, that when the boy grew up, he earned a Watchkeeping Mate licence.

“It means that for eight hours of the day, I’m responsible for the ship, its crew and its safe navigation. I share that responsibility with two other mates and we all work under the captain,” explains 28-year-old Jeff Marchant. 

After graduating from high school, Jeff thought he wanted to study business but it didn’t take long for him to realize he really wanted to work on those ships he’d watched as a boy. He enrolled at NSCC’s nautical institute in Port Hawkesbury where he learned to be a deck-hand, an entry-level position.

“Once I had that, I sailed with the Coast Guard and that course was one year,” he says. “Then I worked and sailed with the Coast Guard for three years as a deckhand and a wheelsman.”

But with aspirations to become an officer, Jeff left the Coast Guard in 2011 and enrolled in the commercial shipping program at Georgian College in Ontario. 

“It’s two-and-a-half years solid,” he says of the program he completed in June 2014. “The way the program is set up, the academic portion is September to April with no spring break and as soon as that’s done, there’s a co-op portion. I spent four months as an officer-in-training on a classic lake ship.”

His co-op provider, who is now his employer, is Algoma, one of the four big shipping companies; another company is Groupe Desgagnés “which people in Pugwash will be familiar with,” says Jeff.

After his second academic semester and co-op, Jeff had the chance to go to China to sail home one of the company’s brand-new Equinox class bulk carriers. This trip also would provide him with deep-sea sailing experience.

“A lot of the co-op providers are within the Great Lakes because that’s where a lot of Canada’s shipping takes place,” he says. “China was an opportunity I’ve never had before. We flew to Shanghai and spent a couple of weeks at the shipyard getting the ship ready to sail. I was still a cadet and had six months of school to complete which was a good way to do it because I got to see all aspects of the ship and everything had to be done from scratch because they were new ships.”

All eight ships in this new class are being built in China so in order to make these lake ships safe for a sea crossing, the company designed a Delivery Voyage Strengthening system in which two eight-foot walls were welded onto the sides of the ship. Those walls were removed once the ship reached the St. Lawrence Seaway.

Jeff on the deck of the Algoma Equinox in China in 2013.

According to Jeff, the difference between lake ships and sea ships is weight. Lake ship construction is not as strong as ships built for deep sea because there is no significant wave action to deal with. Lake ships are lighter which means they can carry more cargo.

“All the ships are bound to the Great Lakes so their construction doesn’t allow them to pass Anticosti Island which is in the northern section of Quebec. They’re not allowed to travel east of that.”

Having now experienced both sea and lake sailing, Jeff says he prefers lake.

“There’s a lot more going on, I like the responsibility, and it’s a healthy dose of stress. I’m still learning, there’s no question. I finished the six months I had left at school and immediately went to work as third officer on the Algoma Equinox and I’m still learning the systems. There’s so much more to learn and I want to master it.”

As a Watchkeeping Mate, Jeff works on the bridge. 

“I work with an Able-Bodied Seaman (AB) and that person steers the boat for me. I take in all the information available, all the other vessels in my area, course alternations and channels, and I’m responsible for making sure the ship is safely within those areas. The AB is responsible for actually manoeuvering the ship. If it’s time to alter course, I know what the next course is and I’ll look at the AB and say, ‘Please bring the ship to, say, south 1-8-0.’ He or she does the physical work while I do the monitoring.”

He says the 2013 movie, Captain Phillips, starring Tom Hanks, provides a very accurate idea of the work done on a commercial ship like his. 

“Less the pirates, of course,” he laughs.

After graduation, Jeff went to work almost immediately and worked for six months straight. While he says living on a ship was hard at first, it didn’t take long to settle in because it’s similar to home.

“On board, everyone has their own cabin. The rooms are really well-furnished for the most part. On every ship I’ve been on so far, everyone has their own washroom and shower. On the Equinox, for example, I had a nice big closet, a refrigerator, a toaster oven, a couch (which on a ship is called a settee). I have a double bed, a great big window, a flat panel television with satellite TV and Internet. I have a desk for doing paperwork.”

And all his meals are provided by a galley staff who cooks for a crew of 18 people plus cadets. 

In the hierarchy of a ship, Jeff has been sailing as a second and third mate. When he first started working after graduation, he had no desire to be a captain but the last six months have changed his mind.

“I was always kind of nervous of the position but now I’ve seen different people holding the position,” he says. “I’ve sailed with a few different captains and picked up a lot of good stuff from all of them and now I see that, with the proper training and more experience, I’d have no problem.”

Jeff says there are plenty of job opportunities in the shipping industry for young people graduating from high school. 

“There’s a shortage in both engineering and deckside so if you have an interest in either, grab a course calendar and head to Port Hawkesbury or Ontario.” 

The commercial shipping year runs from late March to early January and Jeff is using the few months off during the winter for training. 

“The licence I’m going for now will be first mate. Once the training is complete and I get enough sea time, I’ll apply for my licence. Once I take a position on board a ship, I will manage the ship, the personnel and be responsible for cargo and piloting. I really want to get this first mate licence. I’m in school mode and I want to stay there and get it over with.”

Besides the challenging work, what Jeff appreciates about his chosen career is that he can live anywhere he wants, including home in Nova Scotia.

“The position pays well, just as good as Alberta, and I actually get more time off than that guy travelling to Alberta. I’m closer to home. While I do spend more than three or four weeks at a time working,  I’m home for three months at a time.”

An Old Dog Gets Older

Stella is 12 years old today. When she was 18 months old, her nickname was "Frankenstella" because she was such a little monster. These days, with the grey face and the less bendy hips and knees and the lumpy spine showing through her fur, we call her "Stellasaurus".
Age hasn't really diminished Stella; she's in pretty good health for a 12-year-old pure bred. All age has done is mellowed her. But not her appetite, of course; even with her gum problems which we see now prevent her from actually chewing food -- as if she ever did -- she remains as ever food-oriented.
Thereby earning her the nickname "Guts".
And truthfully, since I started adding a teaspoon of coconut oil to her breakfast in January, Stella seems to be doing better than she was a year ago.
Happy Birthday, Guts. Enjoy your cake.

4H Woodsmen Water Boil

The first club meeting for the 4H woodsmen competition was held yesterday afternoon in the leader's farm yard and it was an eye-opening experience for me. Till now, 4H has been about club meetings and   projects like cake decorating and rabbit. Pretty easy stuff right in my comfort zone. Even spending Saturday morning at the club's Public Speaking and Demonstration Day was familiar ground to me.
But put a saw in my hands and show me the stance for sawing a cookie off a log in which every pull (not push) of the saw matters and it's definitely unfamiliar ground. This was the first experience I've had so far in 4H that's been true to my mission for the column, and as it turns out, to the 4H motto: Learn by doing!
Pictured above is the water boil and while I've seen photos in our newspaper from the woodsmen competition at the county rally (which is March 28), nothing compares to seeing this live. In the photo, Will and Olivia are using kindling he cut and shavings she made to light a fire -- with one of their three matches. After the fire is going, the trick is to place the can of soapy water on the fire without putting it out and then to keep the fire going. At one point, Will and Liv were both lying flat on their stomachs, one blowing on the fire while the other turned her head away.
My nerves couldn't stand it! Then again, I'm not 12 or 16 or 21 years old. But what a skill-testing event. Every second counts -- especially if it's windy.
Why the soapy water? You're done as soon as the bubbles boil over the top of the can.
I'll say more about the woodsmen competition in my next "A Year In 4H" column at the end of March.