A Blessing From the Road

The Canso Causeway links mainland Nova Scotia with Cape Breton Island

 

(inspired by my recent one-woman road trip to visit a friend in Cape Breton; by oneself for three hours there and three hours back is plenty of thinking and observing time) 

Remember this, 

when you are clutching the wheel 

and riding the gas pedal and the brake,

not sure whether to gear up or gear down,

or maybe even flip on the hazard lights: 

You can drive when it’s foggy,

when you can only see what is around you

(the present)

but you can’t see in the distance

(the future)

because you know it’s safe

to believe the road will rise to meet you

even if you can’t see it

It will unfurl itself 

even as you are reach it 

Sometimes silence as you drive

is soothing

and surprising

Other times,

you need to turn up the music

As Taylor Swift sings, 

“I’ve been having a hard time adjusting

I had the shiniest wheels

Now they’re rusting” 

Remember this,

behind that hovering fog is the light

burning away those misty droplets

to reveal a glimmer, a gleam,

a beam, a beacon

Of course, it reveals there are mountains to climb,

and the road is never flat,

never straight,

and not always easy

And Taylor Swift sings,

“Hell was the journey but it brought me heaven”

Even if your backseat is full of regrets and what-ifs

and bitter recriminations,

all three wrestling for their own seatbelt,

even if you have to shout 

I’m going to stop this car – 

(although you won’t)

Just roll down the windows

and let them fly out with the dirty napkins

stained with the words you say to yourself 

And Jann Arden sings,

“These are the days

There’s life in your soul

Although your struggling to stay afloat

With nowhere on earth to go”

The signs are everywhere:

Nova Scotia Strong

and you are strong,

a tank full of courage and sorrow,

resilience and longing

Grief is an asphalt ribbon

stretching out ahead for years,

controlled access

and always under construction

And Jann Arden sings, 

“There’s life in you yet

Although you’re lost in the mire and the hate

And the bitterness of losing your faith

There’s light in your eyes

Full of hope and grace”

Because there are signs,

if you keep your eyes open:

Marshy Hope,

and Be Prepared to Stop,

and most wonderfully,

Divided Highway Ends,

and we all heave a sigh of relief

and honk our horns

as our shoulders detach from our ears,

and we can hope again,

even if the ground is wet and spongy. 

And Taylor Swift sings,

“I had a marvelous time ruining everything” 

Yet these are the days

when the holy moments 

are found in the fog

and the cloudless blue sky

in the chitchat at the gas station

and the four-fingered waves on country roads

where everyone thinks they know you

in the six eagles soaring over the causeway

in a slipstream between human and divine

and your white knuckles ease on the wheel

and you yield to the journey

as your spirit merges with the destination 

as a bridge from here to there

~ Sara Jewell